Guess Who
by FrancesOsgood
Summary: I really should have known we'd get caught sooner or later...
1. Chapter 1

I really should have known we'd get caught sooner or later. I guess it had been going on so long _without_ us getting caught that I took it for granted that we never would. After all, we had been doing it for almost six months and no one even suspected a thing.

By "we," I mean Jareth and me. And by "doing it," I mean doing **IT**. In six months, we'd had sex on nearly every flat surface in my house (and some not-so-flat ones too.)

He came to me nearly every night after Dad and Karen went to bed. He also came to me whenever they went out and took Toby with them.

More and more I found myself begging out of family dinner outings or pretending to be sick in order to stay home alone. Who needs crowded restaurants serving overpriced and undercooked pasta when you could stay home and have your toes curl?

Anyway, I'd look sick and pitiful until they left and then I'd tear off my fluffy pink robe to reveal my naughty black lingerie and then call for a certain smexy Goblin King to come rip it off with his teeth. I was usually sleeping soundly when my family returned.

I remember Karen coming up to my room after one particularly energetic romp and placing a perfectly manicured hand on my forehead.

"Sarah!" she cried. "You're so flushed and feverish! You must feel awful!"

I was tempted to say, "No, after multiple orgasms, I'm feeling pretty damn good," but I kept my mouth shut. No reason to give the poor woman a brain aneurism.

When Dad told me that he wanted the family to go away for the weekend, my mind went into overdrive. I knew there was no way I was going anywhere. The possibility of a weekend home alone (but not alone) was far too tempting. A weekend alone with Jareth. He could stay the night and we could wake up together and have coffee in bed. Or we could skip coffee and just have each other in bed, or on the sofa, or on the kitchen table.

All. Weekend. Long.

"I have to study," I blurted to my dad. He looked at me strangely.

"What?" he asked.

"I have to study for a Biology exam. It's a huge grade and I'll be reading all weekend." I gushed on. "I'll be okay though. You guys go ahead and I'll just stay here and make use of the peace and quiet."

Dad smiled and nodded. There was no way he was going to argue against me studying. I overheard him talking to Karen later about how pleased he was that I was taking college so seriously. I had to laugh. Poor dad. The only Biology I was going to be studying that weekend was Jareth's hot bod pressed up against mine. I suppose that's why it was such a huge surprise when, on Friday night, my dad and Karen walked into their bedroom and found me riding Jareth cowgirl-style on their bed.

"Sarah Elizabeth Williams!" my dad yelled from the open door.

Startled, I threw myself off Jareth and onto the floor.

"Dad! Karen!" I cried as I scrambled around for something to throw over myself. "What are you doing home?" I grabbed a folded blanket from the end of the bed and wrapped it around myself.

"The B and B lost our reservation," my father answered icily. He was glaring at Jareth who gracefully swept his long legs over the side of the bed and stood, making no effort to cover his nakedness. From the doorway Karen gasped.

"Studying 'Biology', huh?" my dad asked, his eyes still trained coldly on Jareth. "Does 'Biology' have a name?"

Jareth drew himself up to his full height and stared down his nose at my dad.

"I am Jareth, King of the Goblins. Who are you?" he asked haughtily.

"I'm Robert, Father of Sarah," my dad replied through clenched teeth. "And you have about five seconds to get your pale naked ass out of my bedroom and out of my house before I fill you full of lead shot."

"Daddy, don't be so dramatic," I groaned, rolling my eyes. "I'm eighteen for Christ's sake…"

"Sarah, language," warned Karen.

"Oh good grief!" I cried. "This is why I wanted my own apartment, but no…"

My dad turned to me angrily. "That's why you wanted to move out? So you could sleep around with a bunch of glam rock rejects?"

"Robert, please calm down," Karen tried to interject.

"I will not calm down, Karen! Did you see what they were doing? In our bed?"

"Robert-"

Everyone started talking loudly at once. Well, everyone except Jareth. He just stood back and watched, no doubt amused by the silly mortals getting so worked up over a perfectly natural and normal act.

"Jareth, a little help here?" I cried over the din.

He smiled knowingly and waved his hand and my father disappeared.

"What did you do with my dad?" I asked him.

"Oubliette," he replied simply

"Jareth…"

"Just until he calms down and we can talk rationally," Jareth assured me.

"Great," I grunted sarcastically. "I'll never see my father again."

I knew what a stubborn and temperamental man my dad could be. After all, I had inherited my nature from him.

"Never fear, Precious," Jareth purred before kissing the top of my head. He turned to Karen who had gone even paler than usual. He gave her a graceful little bow and then with a snap of his fingers he was dressed from head to toe in black leather and armor.

"A pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Williams," he said, flashing a brilliant smile.

"Likewise," squeaked Karen.

Jareth winked at me before disappearing in a cloud of smoke and glitter.

The room fell silent and I shifted uncomfortably, unsure what to say to relieve the awkwardness. Leave it to Karen to make things even more awkward.

"Well, he seems nice," she cooed.

"Oh dear God, please kill me," I muttered to myself.

"I could use some tea," Karen continued. "Would you like something to drink, Sarah?"

"Do we have any tequila?"

* * *

"So…" said Karen, setting the cup of tea in front of me. She took a seat across from me at the kitchen table and looked at me expectantly.

"What do you want to know?" I asked with a sigh.

"Everything," replied Karen, leaning forward.

I sighed again. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you'd want to know how I ended up getting into an intimate relationship with an immortal being from an Otherwordly realm."

I started at the beginning and told Karen the whole story. She listened intently, her eyes growing wide with wonder as I described wishing Toby away, running the labyrinth, oubliettes, talking hats, stenchy bogs, roofie peaches, and my eventual defeat of Jareth.

Karen sat back when I had finished. "So, let me get this straight," she began, "He took your brother away, made you run his maze, drugged you, danced with you, offered you your dreams and then disappeared?"

"Well, yes. More or less," I told her.

"And then what?"

I took a sip of my tea before answering. "And then I didn't see him or hear from him again for nearly three years. Until my last birthday."

"What happened on your birthday?"

I set my cup down on the table and glanced at the kitchen wall, slightly embarrassed at how I had behaved.

"Well, it's really pretty stupid now," I began slowly. "I was upset because I was turning eighteen and you guys weren't making a big deal of it. Dad had that meeting and you and Toby took off and went to the movies and I was home all alone on my birthday. I was feeling pretty rotten and sorry for myself so I went out and bought myself a birthday cupcake and stuck a candle in it and…I made a wish."

I paused, hoping Karen would understand what I was getting at and that I wouldn't be forced to explain further, but no such luck. Karen gave me a confused look over her tea cup and I reluctantly continued.

"I wished for the Goblin King to come and talk to me."

"Talk?" asked Karen, raising a sculpted eyebrow.

"Yes, talk," I replied with a shrug. "I just wanted someone to talk to. I was all alone and it was my birthday…"

"And he came?"

"Yes. He came and we talked."

"About?"

"About everything: me, him, you and Dad and Toby, goblins… We walked in the park and all over town and just talked. Then he brought me home."

"And then?" Karen asked.

"And then he kissed me. And I kissed him back. And then we…"

I stopped, feeling my cheeks burning red.

"And then you gave him your flower," Karen finished for me with a pathetic sigh and a goofy grin.

I leaned forward and laid my head down on the table.

"Yes Karen," I groaned. "I gave him my flower."

I was rescued from further embarrassment at the hands of my stepmother by the arrival of Toby who had thankfully been watching television in the den since he and Karen and Dad had gotten back.

"Where's Daddy?" he asked.

Karen and I looked at one another warily.

"Daddy's popped out for a minute," I told my brother. "He'll be back soon."

_I hope._

* * *

**A/N:**

**I honestly have no idea where this is going to go. I just saw this little scene in my head and had to write it. I'll let it stew a bit and see what happens next. In the meantime, I welcome ideas, comments, critiques, etc. Feed me please, I'm starving!**


	2. He SaysShe Says

**Guess Who **

**He Says/She Says**

**Jareth:**

I remained hidden in the shadows of the oubliette while Robert Williams ranted and raved and swore to do all manner of wretched things to me. He threatened to sue me, though what he would want with a crumbling castle, a horde of goblins and a brood of black chickens I can't imagine. He threatened to have me incarcerated, but I'm fairly sure he knew his case would never stand up in any court. After all, his daughter was of age, and even if she had not been, I have on numerous occasions defended myself more than adequately before a judge and jury. Williams continued in his tirade as I calmly listened from my dark corner of the oubliette. He swore to, and I quote, "kick my skinny ass." I almost chuckled aloud at that one. The thought of that pudgy, balding CPA going against me in a physical fight was beyond amusing. When he threatened to kill me I could hide no longer. I stepped from the shadows in my black leather and armor and was pleased when Williams visibly shrank back from my presence.

"Really, Mr. Williams," I said calmly. "Is all this necessary? Your daughter and I were merely finding pleasure in one another. Surely that's not worth murder."

Robert Williams furrowed his brow and growled at me, "My Sarah is worth it," he spat. "She's an impressionable girl and you have no business fooling around with her."

I shook my head at the little red-faced man. "I must disagree," I told him as I paced in a circle around him. "Your daughter, though impressionable, is hardly a girl. And I do have every right to 'fool around with her' as you say since _she_ called on _me._"

Robert Williams stared at me in disbelief. "She didn't…" he muttered half to himself.

"Oh but she did," I informed him. "Twice now, in fact."

"She wished her brother away, didn't she?" Williams asked softly. I halted in my pacing and turned to him, surprised by his question.

"How-?" I started to ask, but Sarah's father shook his bald head and gave a wistful chuckle.

"Who do you think gave her the damn book?" he asked.

* * *

**Sarah:**

"Are you madly in love?" Karen asked from out of the blue. I nearly choked on my tea.

"What?" I asked, coughing and sputtering. "No! I mean, we're just… I like him a lot. I haven't really thought that far ahead. We have a bit of an odd history, after all."

Karen nodded. "Of course," she agreed. "Still, lots of relationships have started under stranger circumstances."

"Yeah, there was that whole Frog/Prince thing," I said sarcastically.

"You know what I mean, Sarah," Karen replied, taking a dainty sip of her tea. "Lots of couples start out as less than friends and then grow to love each other." She got a goofy grin on her face as she continued. "Maybe the two of you can be like that movie, 'When Harry Met Sally.'"

My mind immediately went to the deli scene and Meg Ryan's over-the-top "orgasm." After six months of brain-rattling sex, I could hardly imagine ever having to fake it with Jareth. He was a pro at anticipating my desires and needs and usually had me over the edge before my clothes hit the floor. Even at that moment, sitting at the kitchen table with my stepmother, I could feel myself flushing at the thought of him: his pale, smooth, magic fingers, his long lithe body, his hot probing tongue… My mouth went dry and I took a big gulp of tea.

"I certainly hope the two of you are using protection," said Karen.

I spit tea all over the kitchen wall.

* * *

**Jareth:**

"So, after three years she called on you again and you went to her and…" Robert Williams hesitated to continue.

"Made love to her, yes," I finished for him.

He cleared his throat and tugged at his collar. He seemed terribly uncomfortable and I assumed it was the rather stale, musty air in the oubliette. It could be quite oppressive. It was important, however, that I keep him contained. If Robert Williams was anything at all like his daughter, my kingdom would be in danger of wreck and ruin if he ever got loose.

"Just what are your intentions toward Sarah?" her father asked flatly.

I smiled, pleased at his gallant show of paternal concern, however late.

"I'd like to marry her if I may, Mr. Williams," I told him, playing the part of the Suppliant Suitor.

"Have you asked her yet?" questioned Williams.

"Informally, yes," I answered. "I asked her three years ago and she turned me down flat, but she was a bit young then. I haven't repeated the offer. Yet."

"Why not?"

I thought for a moment before answering. "The status of our relationship is…uncertain. She knows I love her, but I'm not quite sure she reciprocates."

"And you haven't discussed this with Sarah? You haven't tried to talk to her about it?"

"Well…no," I told him. "Sarah hasn't really been much for conversation lately. She pounces on me as soon as I enter the room, and I'm sure you can understand how difficult it is to talk to a woman when she has her hand down your pants."

Robert Williams shuddered. "Oh. Yes. Certainly."

* * *

**Sarah:**

"I can make you an appointment to get some birth control if you'd like, Sarah. Dr. Greene is wonderful and she won't treat you like you're a whore or anything. She's all for women's rights and sexual exploration and all that," Karen offered.

I silently prayed for the earth to open up and swallow me whole. At least with that there was a chance that I would end up in the Underground.

"I don't need you to do that, Karen," I replied slowly. "I've been on the pill for over a year, and besides Jareth always…takes precautions." I let Karen come to her own conclusions on that one. His magic assured that he wouldn't impregnate me until we decided to let it happen, but if Karen chose to believe we were using condoms I wasn't going to tell her otherwise. I didn't need her dragging me to the drug store and asking me about Jareth's "size." This conversation had been mortifying enough.

"So…how is he?" Karen asked slyly.

"What?!" Our mortifying conversation had just turned into the stuff of nightmares.

Karen leaned forward and pitilessly continued. "Does he, you know… get you there?"

_Oh dear bog-slogging goblins, why are there no sharp objects within arm's reach?_

* * *

**A/N:**

**I finally have more! As dear Ellen would say, (Kermit arms) Yaaay! Thanks to all who have read and reviewed! Keep 'em coming. I get nothing from this except your feedback, so please don't leave me empty. **

**Muah! **

**Fanny**


End file.
